


His Way

by sunshinetina



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-11
Updated: 2015-01-11
Packaged: 2018-03-07 02:50:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3158465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinetina/pseuds/sunshinetina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'That’s how they say it: He loves you in his own way. Well, what about my way? What if I need for him to love me in my way?'</p>
            </blockquote>





	His Way

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Ever since I read my fave Contra is leaving AO3, I wanted to write something about Mats and Benni (although not my usual pairing, as most of you may know), similar to her style, but my muse was never with me. Until I read this fabulous quote by Tammara Weber, and decided to quickly drabble something. I hope it's alright. *blushes*
> 
> CONTRA, LIEBLING, DU WIRST MICH FEHLEN! ;/ <333

You still remember that night. The night when he looked at you through his long eyelashes and murmured _This is not a goodbyе_. (But if it’s not a goodbye, then why does it hurt so much when he slams the door on his way out?)

 

The room is dark and moist and empty, and you can’t quite recall the last moment when it wasn’t dark. (It was when his body was pressed against yours, when he was loudly moaning your name.) You want to light up a cigarette but then you remember that the heavy smoke always makes him cough. And it doesn’t make sense because he is not around and you shouldn’t care, but, alas, you always do.

 

You place your palm on your chest and half-close your eyes, trying to invite the sleep that still isn’t coming. Instead, all you see is his shy smile, his dimmed brown eyes, his thin hair. (Someone else’s now, you recall.) You keep being oblivious – rather, you _force_ yourself into being oblivious – trying your best to focus on the next short night you two would spend together and your _I love you_ whispers pointlessly breathed in his ear.

 

He is with her now, cannot be denied. And as you throw yourself against Cathy the other day, you try to remember the reason of your unhappiness with her. (It’s not that you don’t love her but, then again, what does _love_ mean?)

 

And then it strikes you – it’s all about love, isn’t it?

 

You take Cathy in your arms and she snuggles closer to you and you keep your eyes tight shut, locking yourself away in your small world. (The world ruled by Benni.) You remember everything – every small gesture, every smile, every stare, every kiss, every sigh – but above all, Marco’s voice always echoes in your ears: _He loves you in his own way_.

 

 _He loves you in his own way_. You tell yourself when he leaves and doesn’t call for weeks.

 

 _He loves you in his own way._ When he kisses Lisa and tells her the _I love you_ you crave for at night.

 

 _He loves you in his own way._ He does. (God knows, he does.)

 

But you don’t want this way. You want him to love you in _your_ way.

 

(And you two know that _your_ kind of love would kill you both.)


End file.
